Happy Holidays!

As the end of 2009 rapidly approaches, the WC2ed would like to wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! Use this holiday break to connect with your family in new and deeper ways. After all, the best things in life aren't things!



We would also encourage you to continue reading our blog in 2010 and sharing it with your friends as well. We hope to keep you up-to-date on topics relevant to teens and healthy relationships.

However, in 2010 we don't want to blog topics to just come from us, but to also have some ideas on what you want to hear about as well. So we'd like to offer you a chance to throw out some ideas in the comment section. We welcome questions, advice or just something you've heard about in the news that you'd like to know more about. We gladly welcome the interaction!

With that, take care and God bless! We will connect with you next year! Read More.....

What Happens at Fifteen?

I am always amazed at the shear invincibility that teenagers believe themselves to possess. But who can blame them? They are full of life and each new experience gives them a jolt of dopamine and endorphins, flooding their brains with that unique “high” sensation.

With time and through observing the mistakes of others however, wisdom comes. Everyone one of us would want to spare teens – whether it is your own child, a relative, or a neighbor – from painful consequences and the shocking reality of their vulnerable humanity.

This morning I was reminded of a song written by a young adult as she looks back on life as a teenager. It’s a warning to teenage girls especially to be aware of the choices they make during high school.

Choices like naively thinking they will marry the boy who says he loves her. Choices like giving everything to a boy so she can feel wanted. Choices like getting caught up in the fleeting drama of high school without figuring out who you are and who you want to be.

The song is Fifteen, by Taylor Swift.

(You can read the lyrics and watch the video below.)

Fifteen

You take a deep breath and you walk through the doors

It's the morning of your very first day

And you say hi to your friends you ain't seen in a while

Try and stay out of everybody's way

It's your freshman year and you're gonna be here

For the next four years in this town

Hoping one of those senior boys will wink at you and say

"You know, I haven't seen you around before"

'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you

You're gonna believe them

And when you're fifteen feeling like there's nothing to figure out

Well, count to ten, take it in

This is life before you know who you're gonna be

Fifteen

You sit in class next to a redhead named Abigail

And soon enough you're best friends

Laughing at the other girls who think they're so cool

We'll be outta here as soon as we can

And then you're on your very first date and he's got a car

And you're feeling like flying

And you're momma's waiting up and you're thinking he's the one

And you're dancing 'round your room when the night ends

When the night ends

'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you

You're gonna believe them

When you're fifteen and your first kiss

Makes your head spin 'round

But in your life you'll do things greater than

Dating the boy on the football team

But I didn't know it at fifteen

When all you wanted was to be wanted

Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now

Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday

But I realized some bigger dreams of mine

And Abigail gave everything she had to a boy

Who changed his mind and we both cried

'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you

You're gonna believe them

And when you're fifteen, don't forget to look before you fall

I've found time can heal most anything

And you just might find who you're supposed to be

I didn't know who I was supposed to be at fifteen

Your very first day

Take a deep breath girl

Take a deep breath as you walk through the doors

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When a floor is more...

Came across this blog entry on the Rated G Romance website. Thought it was so adorable I just had to share!

When a floor is more…

It was our 26th anniversary on May 14th and we spent the better part of the day upgrading our kitchen floor. We installed the new vinyl plank flooring I bought the Mrs. as a present.

Tres romantic, n’est pas? Normally, no. Household upgrades are not romantic for most couples. However, for us it was.

Why? “Quality” time is my lovely’s number one love language. And what did we do? We spent an entire day together talking and working toward a common goal.

Let me spin the story another way to show you what I mean…

I took an unpaid leave day so that we could spend our special day together. We woke slowly, playing the “I love you because” game and snuggling. After a romantic breakfast (she made me my favorite ), we cleaned up and went out to one of her favorite stores. I bought her a little something she’d been wanting for months. The afternoon was full of music and talk of goals and rememberings. At dinner, she took me to a restaurant that I had always wanted to visit. The sun sparkling on the water of the inlet outside our window matched the sparkle in my sweeties eyes.

We finished our meal, went for a walk on the boardwalk, then returned home to more time together. The moments we shared were precious. Midnight approached and it was time for us to head to bed. “Wait,” she smiled, “we need to dance.” Music played (http://blip.fm/~6c084) as we finished our evening dancing in the kitchen.

The fact that we were testing the new floor we had spent the day installing was beside the point. ;-)

By Gregory Blake of RatedGRomance.com

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No Sex Please, We're Vampires

(CNN) -- "New Moon," the latest film in "The Twilight Saga" is doing record business at the box office.

In its opening weekend the film grossed $140.7 million -- more than any other film with an autumn release in history.

The tales of teenage vampire love based on the best-selling books by Stephanie Meyer have wooed film-goers without having to resort to acres of flesh being on display.

This distinct lack of on-screen sex runs contrary to the popular trend of portraying teenagers on screen as playing fast and loose with their virginity and affections.

Love and the importance of relationships most definitely rule in "The Twilight Saga" and the formula is proving popular with audiences.

Elizabeth Morowitz, Communications Professor at the University of Missouri and author of "Bitten By Twilight" thinks that this more sensitive approach is the key to the film's success.

"A lot of people ask 'what's so appealing about the Twilight and why is it popular now?' and we think it's because of the relationships and the messages about love in Twilight. In a more conservative environment we've had this push for abstinence education, so we now have a media message that's more congruent with that. So perhaps some teens relate to it in that way," Morowitz told CNN's Katie Walmsley.

The director of "New Moon" Chris Weitz says that sexual abstinence is central to the film's appeal.

"It's not that they can't have sex, they choose not to and I think there's so much popular culture that's saying to young people: 'you'll be cool if you have sex' or 'it's important to be sexy' whereas this series really concentrates on matters of the heart and spirit and I think that's lovely," Weitz told CNN.

A dashing male lead, in the shape of Robert Pattison doesn't hurt either when you're trying to attract a female teenage audience.

But whatever the exact recipe for its undoubted success it looks like teenagers in the "Twilight" world don't like to bite off more than they can chew.

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No Joke: Marriage is Good for You!

By Frank Vascellaro
WCCO News, Minnesapolis

Dr. William Doherty, a professor at the University of Minnesota, says that in marriage, good enough is good.

When you got married, you probably heard a few ball-and-chain remarks, but those are just jokes. The reality is that marriage is good for you.

We asked three couples to tell us the favorite things their spouses do for them. Rich Goldsmith says his wife gives a pretty amazing scalp massage.

"She'll just kind of rub my head and it's like, oh, it just kind of caps off my day, makes it nice and takes some of the stress away," He said.

Kari Anderson Slade tried to tell us about her husband Mark's great bear hugs, but her daughter interrupted her.

"And that answers the question," said Kari with a laugh. "We don't do anything for each other anymore because we have her."

Tony Richardson loves something his wife Bridget does every weekend.

"She lets me sleep late on Saturdays," he said.

Their marriages might not be perfect, but they don't have to be.

William Doherty, a professor at the University of Minnesota, says that in marriage, good enough is good.

"A pretty good, a good enough marriage, is something that gives people a sense of stability, a security," he explained. "It's good for us. We kind of know that by common sense, but the research also supports it."

Doherty showed us a long list of the benefits of marriage, complete with citations. Married people have more money. They're happier. They're healthier. They live longer. And their kids do better.

Doherty, who's been married to his wife Leah for 38 years, has a theory about the health benefits of marriage. It's not molecular theory, but a mole theory. He says it's not just that your wife "has your back." She sees it, too.

"Who else except somebody you're married to you sees moles on your back than your spouse, and your spouse may say, 'That looks suspicious, you should have the doctor see that,'" said Doherty. "First of all, it's somebody you're married to who saw it, and secondly it's someone who's going to nag you to go to the doctor."

See the video clip of this news report by clicking here. Read More.....

Sick of the Lies

For years now, photoshop and other programs have been used to bring normal models to barbie like proportions and out-of-this-world unattainable beauty. I thought I had seen it all, like the slimming of waists, filling out of breasts, and the removing of wrinkles. Take for instance the images of Jessica Alba below. The left is the original, and the right is after the airbrushing.

But the airbrushing has now gone to new levels. I recently received a link to an article called "Image of ultra-thin Ralph Lauren model sparks outrage." The image is incredibly disturbing. The model's body has been distorted using technology, but goes way beyond "trimming and slimming" to the point of making her look like an anorexic.

Here is how the article from Yahoo put it, "The latest such image to cause an uproar is one featured in a new Ralph Lauren advertisement that shows a model, Filippa Hamilton, so emaciated that her waist actually appears to be smaller than her head." Here is the image...brace yourself!

Crazy huh? And we wonder why our young girls have such a distorted picture of beauty! Despite all the bad messages out there, we are lucky to have a few individuals and a few organizations that care enough to stand up and say something. Here are a few that I would recommend:

1. America the Beautiful. A new documentary due out on DVD this fall that asks the question: "Is America obsessed with beauty?" Click the link to watch the trailer and find out how you can get your copy!
2. Operation Beautiful. An organization who hosts a wonderful blog with a simple mission: to post anonymous notes in public places for other women to find. The point is that WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL. You are enough... just the way you are!
3. Campaign for Real Beauty. Hosted by Dove, this campaign uses video clips and advertising to show young girls what real beauty is about. Below is one of their fantastic videos. Pass it on!

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A Local Erie College discusses "Hooking Up and Breaking Down: the Missing Links in Relationships"

It's been a few days since we last published a post.  Why?  Because we've been too busy!!  What a great problem to have.  We love interacting with teens and college students.  Here is a recent article written by a college student after attending one of our events...

Rappers discuss hook ups, college life
By: Krista Mershimer, staff writer for Gannon Knight News
Gannon University, Erie PA
 
College is a period of discovery, whether it is educational, spiritual or political. It can also be sexual, a difficult subject to talk about when perceptions about sex and relationships conflict.


This was the topic of discussion in Club LaRiccia Tuesday night: “Hooking Up and Breaking Down: The Missing Link in Relationships.” Sponsored by the Gannon Social Work Club, Students for Life and Student Health Services, the discussion brought together representatives from WC2 ed, a division of the Women’s Care Center, and hip hop artist/speaker Los 1 to reinforce the need for healthy relationships.

Presentation specialist Patty Fitzgerald said that her college experience was important for her personal growth.

“College was a time to make or break me – a defining time,” she said. “Knowledge is power, especially when it comes to healthy relationships.”

The discussion emphasized the four C’s of dating and relationships: communication, cohabitation, consequences and commitment – topics that are often taboo in many relationships. Students were encouraged to interact (pictured below - Katie Cogswell/ Knight) with a panel of their peers and with married couples who discussed issues ranging from first impressions and true love to separation and divorce.

In between role-playing activities, the powerful lyrics of Los 1’s “LifeSkills” CD permeated the room speaking to students about having a positive self-image, making good choices and respecting themselves. Trained to teach lessons on character and sexual purity to teens, the Brooklyn native uses his music to reinforce learning as he travels from school to school across America.

Los 1 (pictured above - Katie Cogswell/ Knight) said the main issue is perception.

“Kids today see sex in the media, on TV, in music, in school and they need a way to navigate through all of it,” he said. “We need to teach these kids to care about themselves.”

Social Work Club President Chris Frye said that sex and relationships need to be discussed.

“It’s real-life stuff and it’s not to be played with,” the senior social work major said. “Having advice from professionals instead of friends can help students make better choices in their relationships.”

Sophomore nursing major Katie Bauer said that the most important thing couples can have in a relationship is compatibility.

“Know your values and stick to them,” Bauer said. “Know what you want out of the relationship and figure out your boundaries early on.”

Sophomore occupational therapy major Maria Crawford said that couples should also be able to trust their partners in any situation.

According to its Web site, the Women’s Care Center in Erie’s motto says it strives to faithfully empower teens to make the best decisions for their future by teaching values of character, healthy relationships and marriage.

“Our goal is to help these youth achieve optimal health and the best life advantage,” Fitzgerald said.

“Prevention is key because that’s how we avoid becoming just another statistic. Its never easy, but it’s common sense: anything worth having is worth working for.”

For more information about the Women’s Care Center, go to http://www.wc2ed.org/.  Music from Los 1 can be found at http://www.los1.com/ or at www.myspace.com/los1music

KRISTA MERSHIMER
mershime001@gannon.edu Read More.....

You Can End Child Poverty...HOW?!

Yesterday I was on the internet when an ad entitled “Obama wants mothers to go back to school” popped up. While I understand how educating single-parent mothers is important, however if we are striving to decrease child poverty the mothers’ education alone is not the answer.


You might be asking, how can that be? What else could decrease poverty besides education?


Try M-A-R-R-I-A-G-E.


Don’t believe me? Read the research below…


August 2, 2002
The Effects of Marriage and Maternal Education in Reducing Child Poverty
by Robert Rector and Kirk A. Johnson, Ph.D.

Maternal education without marriage is generally ineffective in reducing child poverty. The poverty levels of children raised by never-married mothers remain high even if the mother has a high-school or college degree.

Specifically, the analysis reveals the following facts:

• On average, a child raised by a never-married mother is nine times more likely to live in poverty than a child born and raised by two parents in an intact marriage. (see graph below and click to enlarge)

• Overall, nearly 80 percent of long-term child poverty occurs to children raised in some type of broken family or by a parent who never married.


• Raising a child in an intact marriage is roughly two and a half times more effective than adding four years to a mother's education in reducing child poverty. (see graph below and click to enlarge)





• On average, a child raised by a never-married mother with a four-year college degree is three and a half times more likely to be poor than is a child born and raised in an intact married family by a mother who has only a high-school education.


• Children raised in intact married families whose mothers are high-school dropouts spend about the same amount of time in poverty as children raised by never-married mothers who have a four-year college degree.


• Marriage has a significant effect in reducing child poverty, even if the marriage does not last throughout a boy's or girl's entire childhood. Being raised in a married two-parent family for just half of one's childhood reduces poverty as much as adding four years to a mother's education does.

In conclusion the authors note that: the current analysis indicates that, operating together, both marriage and maternal education can play a significant role in reducing child poverty.

The most effective public policy to reduce child poverty would encourage young women both to complete high school and enter into a healthy marriage before they have children. By contrast, a policy that focuses on maternal education exclusively and is indifferent or hostile to marriage is not likely to be successful.

Has anyone told President Obama this?


To read the study in full, http://www.heritage.org/research/family/cda02-05.cfm Read More.....

Join us on Sept 19 for the Celebrate Life Banquet!

This year, the Women's Care Center of Erie County, Inc (our main office)

is hosting a Celebrate Life Banquet.

We'd love to have you attend on Saturday September 19th at 7pm.

Be our guest and enjoy a wonderful, elegant evening at the Courtyard Marriott with...

...special guest and three time Grammy nominee Michele Pillar.

Michele's has a beautiful voice, compared to that of an angel, but an even more beautiful life story.

Join us for a evening you'll not soon forget. You'll be glad you did!

Click here for more information or to register.

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A Valentine's Day Message Good for Today

Evenings come to an end.
But mistakes last forever.

Powerful, isn't it? This poster was created by the Anscombe Society at Princeton University. The society is a group of students "dedicated to affirming the importance of the family, marriage, and a proper understanding for the role of sex and sexuality."

The Society grew out of the desire some students sensed for something better than the sexually drenched college culture.

Here is the perspective of one student:

"I remember my freshman year, in my hallway at Forbes, we went to our
residential adviser for our study break, and there with the soda pop and the
chips was a bowl with flavored condoms," said Joan Claire Krautmann, a
senior from Salem, Ore. "So immediately, when you get on campus, you're just
bombarded with sexual material."

So here's to a Valentine's Day message that we can use on campus - and everywhere - TODAY.

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