The Ugly Truth Revealed. Hollywood is not the Answer

Over the weekend I saw that the movie TheUglyTruth was playing at a nearby theater. Although the movie came out in late July, this was my first time seeing it advertised.

Just look at the cover. No need to watch the movie, we already know what it’s about!

The placement of the hearts hints at the saying that...

Men give love to get sex and women give sex to get love.

In the classroom, we describe it like this. Sexually speaking, men are like microwaves and women are like crockpots. This analogy highlights that men get stimulated more easily than women because of their visual nature, while women take longer because they respond when they feel connected and romanced.

So while the movie may highlight some truth, the use of this truth to ‘rope’ a man by wearing low seductive tops and short skirts is not the answer.

In addition, the movie hints that men are only after ‘one thing’ and care nothing of the female’s interests or personality. This paints a rather animalistic view of males which I believe to be unfair.

The point of highlighting the microwave and crockpot truth is to teach teens how to dress modestly and to not arouse or manipulate their date. In addition, we stress the need for self-control for both parties and the importance of getting to know each other before getting physical.


And so, we find TheUglyTruth to rather be that Hollywood is NOT the source for romantic advice and certainly NOT the model for healthy and long-lasting relationships.

Marriage is Good for the Brain

Dr. Ranit Mishori
August 9, 2009

Parade Magazine

We’ve known for some time that married people live longer. Now a new study suggests that matrimony may also help keep the mind sharp—warding off age-related issues like memory loss or dementia.

Researchers studied the changes among a group of 1400 people from Finland—starting from when they were all aged 50 or so, then again 20 years later—and reported the results in the British Medical Journal. They found that the individuals with the greatest risk for Alzheimer’s disease were those who were widowed or divorced at midlife and remained so. Being single at midlife was also a risk factor.

This “marriage effect” appears not to be influenced by how much education the individuals had attained, how much physical exercise they got, or whether they otherwise had active social lives—all factors that other studies have found to be important in determining the risk of dementia.

The authors suggest that having a partner might provide additional mental and social challenges that somehow stimulate the brain and delay the onset of dementia.

Of course, getting Alzheimer’s is not dependent simply on lifestyle. This devastating illness involves a complex interaction of factors that include genetics and environment. What is clear, however, is that people who maintain a healthy and active lifestyle—physically, socially, mentally, and perhaps maritally—appear to have a lower risk of developing the disease.

'Black Manifesto' is a call to rally the African-American community

In a powerful column in Erie's Sunday paper, Bishop Dwane Brock voiced his call to action for the black community. "We cannot expect others to do for us what we can do for ourselves," Brock writes.

The piece empowers the reader with the possibilities for a better society, yet it takes a critical look at the downward spiral and reinforced stereotypes plaguing the black community.

The manifesto is a "prognosis for civility," in three major areas:

1. The strength of black women
2. The courage of black men
3. The need to disintegrate stereotypes

Brock highlights "sexual responsibility" as being imperative to the future and health of the community. He encourages teens with the following:

There are activities that you are too good to involve yourself in. Your
attitude must be: 'I will not give in to the societal or hormonal pressures of being sexually active before I am ready to pay the high cost of
consequences.' Your mentality must be rooted and grounded in a hot pursuit of your goals, dreams and vision. These must become your priorities.

In the manifesto, Brock calls black mothers to teach their daughters the dangers of sexual activity and the weight of out-of-wedlock childbearing. For the men, he highlights the dangers of "uncontrollable passion" and how "having multiple sex partners is irresponsible, ridiculous, unheathy and ultimately will backfire on you."

For all adults, Brock's call to action is this:

If the more mature and experienced generation doesn't teach the younger generation, how shall they learn?

Will we, black and white alike, heed this call to action? That decision is up to you.

Read the Erie Times News article by clicking here

Gardasil Controversy

From: WaitforyourMate.com

If you haven’t seen it already, this Good Morning America segment addresses new evidence about the risks of Gardasil, a vaccine approved by the FDA in 2006 to prevent the cancer-causing STD human papillomavirus (HPV).

When it was approved, the CDC and FDA recommended girls (at risk for developing cervical cancer if they are infected with HPV) become vaccinated as early as 11 years old. In the last three years, GMA reports, 7 million Americans have been vaccinated. Of those, 772 cases of serious side effects have been recorded, including 32 deaths.

For concerned parents, this report may be cause to do more research before vaccinating your children. In addition, some parents feel that talking to their teen about sex, in addition to teaching self-control and delay of gratification will keep their child safe from having sex before marriage and thus save them from ALL risks of STDs, including HPV and the resulting cervical cancer.

Read more from Journal of the American Medical Association. It's a great editorial that asks some needed questions!!

Food for Thought

Most parents raise their children with the knowledge that they should eat their plate of veggies before delving in the delights of dessert.

Such a task takes self-control, a character trait that children have very little of. Because they lack the initial willpower, parents help out by putting the cookies out of reach, insisting upon family dinners in which they can monitor correct eating, and offering explanations of why eating vegetables is good for you. This is because self-control is a learned character trait, a muscle that needs to be exercised in order to be strengthened.

The idea that “all kids deserve cookies” or “they are going to eat cookies anyway” doesn’t even dawn on parents. That’s because it’s absurd! Instead, parents are fully convinced of what is BEST for their children, and the responsibility of parenthood drives them to both teach and model habits that lead to healthy living.

But what if parents wanted their children to wait until after dinner to enjoy dessert, but were worried that they might not be able to resist the temptation? Would it be ok for the parents to then tell their children how to sneak dessert but avoid the consequences?

Let’s think about that. Wouldn’t the children then loose all motivation for waiting or even learning to enjoy vegetables, if they knew they could get away with sneaking dessert early? Of course! Our human nature is selfish and if we can take the easy road to gratifying our desires, we will!

What’s more, the resulting consequences would not be immediate. Overtime the unhealthy decision to fill up on dessert would have huge ramifications such as poor nutrition, costly dentist visits, chance of obesity, and risk of lowered self-esteem.

But sometimes it’s not the parents who communicate a permissive message, but others in the community, particularly those who sell the dessert! For example, what if the ice-cream man knew that your child wanted some sweets before dinner and would conveniently make dessert available without your knowledge? Doesn’t that undermine your role as a parent?

What if we were no longer talking about kids and dessert, but teens and sex? The stakes are no longer poor nutrition but sexually transmitted diseases, teen pregnancy, preventable heartaches, and tainted reputations.

Are you a parent who holds up an uncompromising standard of optimal health in your home? Do you teach and model healthy relationship habits that will instruct your children in the area of self-control?

Or do you tell them to wait to have sex, but if they can’t…here’s a condom? What message are you sending them?

It puts new meaning to the saying, “Having your cake and eating it too.”

FL Quarterback Tebow Leaves Reporters Speechless: "Yes I am" Saving Myself for Marriage

Also says he is grateful that his mother's story has helped women choose not to have an abortion

By John Jalsevac

July 30, 2009 (LifeSiteNews.com) - Last week Florida Gators Quarterback Tim Tebow's photo may have graced the cover of Sports Illustrated, the same magazine that is best known for its annual "swimsuit issue," but the contrast between the two cover stories couldn't have been more glaring.

At 21 years of age and graced with boyish good looks, Tebow is one of the most talked about rising stars of the NCAA; but the football superstar literally left reporters speechless last week when he answered a question during a press conference about whether or not he is "saving himself" for marriage.

"Yes I am," said Tebow briefly, who then indicated he was ready for the next question. However, in the video of the press conference, a reporter is heard stumbling over his words in the background as he tries to ask a follow-up question. Tebow then laughs, obviously reacting to the reactions of the reporters in the room.

"I think y'all were stunned by that," he says. "Y'all can't even ask a question. Wow. I mean, I was ready for that question. I don't think y'all were."

It wasn't the only controversial remark that Tebow made that day. In response to another question about whether or not people may be tired of the volume of coverage devoted to the young football star, Tebow, a devout Christian, said that the level of exposure he receives is a mixed blessing. However, he said, he looks at the positive side that, thanks to his fame, he has been able to share his Christian faith with so many people.

In addition, the football star told the reporters that he believes that the publicity given to his mother's story has helped other women choose not to abort their unborn children.

Tebow's mother, who serves as a Christian missionary together with her husband, was pressured to abort Tebow following a life-threatening infection she suffered while pregnant with him. Doctors pressured her to abort her son to save her own life, but she ultimately resisted the pressure and both mother and child survived the birth.

"There has been a lot of people that have been encouraged not to have an abortion because they heard the story of my mom, or they have been encouraged because they have heard me give my faith on TV or in a report or something," said Tebow. "

You know what, although there has been a backlash, oh, well. You know what, I'll deal with it if I have to. It's not a big deal to me because of the kids and people that have been encouraged by the stories we have tried to tell and by the life that I've tried to live."

Growing up Tebow would often help his parents with their Christian mission work in the Philippines. He was homeschooled by his mother, who instilled in her children strong Christian values.

Tebow was the first home-schooled athlete to be nominated for the Heisman Trophy. "That's really cool," he said at the time. "A lot of times people have this stereotype of homeschoolers as not very athletic - it's like, go win a spelling bee or something like that - it's an honor for me to be the first one to do that."

Click here to watch the video from the press conference

Virginity TAKEN

The other day my husband and I watched a movie called Taken. (Please note: I am not writing to promote or demote the movie in any way). After the heart-beating action was over and the movie came to a tear-jerking end, I began to ponder the value of virginity as displayed in the movie.

Let me give you a brief summary of the movie to help make my point (warning: plot spoilers below):

Kim is a beautiful, lively, 17 years old and the pride of her father, a retired secret service agent. Kim convinces her reluctant father, along with her mother and stepfather, to let her travel with her friend Amanda to Paris. Shortly after arriving the unsuspecting girls are taken by an Albanese gang of human trafficers. Kim’s father vows to find and kill her kidnappers and sets off to use his years experience to save her. Kim’s kidnappers don’t hold onto her for long however, for it is discovered that Kim is of high value – for she is a virgin. Kim is therefore forced into the sex trade, controlled by drugs, clothed in revealing attire, and put on display for the highest bidder. This is how her father finally finds her.

It is certainly an intense plot with a disturbing look at the evils of humanity and the hidden economics of sex trafficking.

But the point I want to make is this. Kim is of value because of her virginity.

Yet earlier in the movie her friend Amanda teases Kim because she hasn’t “done” it yet. It is clear that Amanda doesn’t see virginity as valuable, yet something that upon loosing gains you prowess, popularity and partners. Why is it that in our American culture being a virgin is a terrible thing, a source of peer-imposed embarrassment and media-driven stigmas?

And yet, Kim’s virginity is of value only so that some sick, wealthy, older man can selfishly “take” it from her. The title of the movie Taken brings on a whole new meaning.

It is in light of the vicious, greediness of her perpetrators that Kim’s untouched beauty shines more clearly. It is undeniable that a virgin poses an allure felt by all, not solely men.

(funny how feminists would fight virginity as an “old age” societal constraint of their freedoms…yet I wonder how they would respond to this)

I heard one woman put it like this:

“Virgins poses an allure, not because of their purity, but because of the strength that it takes to pose it.”

To read more on sex trafficking, check out Siddharth Kara’s excellent book
Sex Trafficking: Inside the Business of Modern Slavery.