Beautiful, Must See Commercial!

Saw this new "wear your seat belt" commercial the UK is running and loved it. A beautiful depiction of why your loved ones want you to be safe.

And not only with wearing your seat belt, but also making healthy choices about drinking, drugs and premarital sex. Because when it comes down to it, poor choices always affect more people than just yourself. It affects everyone who cares about you.

Fathers Who Are Husbands Spare Children from Poverty

An excellent article by the Heritage Foundation, written by Ken McIntyre.

A wedding ring on Dad’s finger is more than a symbol of his commitment to Mom. It also proves to be the ultimate anti-poverty weapon for their children. Now that’s something to celebrate and encourage this Father’s Day. It’s fitting on Sunday to honor all the fathers who strive to keep that commitment, even when they grow weary.


“The principal cause of child poverty in the U.S. is the absence of married fathers in the home,” Robert Rector, senior research fellow in domestic policy studies at The Heritage Foundation, writes in a new paper. “Marriage is a powerful weapon in fighting poverty. Being married has the same effect in reducing poverty as adding five to six years to a parent’s education level.”

In the paper, accompanied by 12 new charts on marriage and poverty, Rector illustrates the severe social costs of record-high births outside marriage – and of homes without fathers.

The escalating rate of births to unmarried women – four of every 10 babies overall, but more than half the Hispanic births and a staggering seven of every 10 births for blacks – is driving the collapse of marriage in America, especially in lower-income neighborhoods.

As Rector writes:

Marriage matters. But mentioning the bond between marriage and lower poverty violates the protocols of political correctness. Thus, the main cause of child poverty remains hidden from public view. Since the decline of marriage is the principal cause of child poverty and welfare dependence in the U.S. …it would seem reasonable for government to take steps to strengthen marriage.

About two of every three poor children live in single-parent households. Yet if poor single moms married the fathers of their children, nearly two out of three would be lifted out of poverty.

And contrary to the mainstream media line, teen pregnancy is a small part of the picture: In 2008, the most recent year for which data is available, babies born to girls under 18 accounted for 130,000, or 7.5 percent, of the total 1.72 million out-of-wedlock births.

It’s not as simple as young men “manning up” and becoming the lawfully wedded husbands of their girlfriends, live-in or otherwise. These unmarried mothers tend to be in their 20s, without much income or education. They come to depend on public assistance; many learn how to work the welfare system.

Research shows that a child raised in a home where Dad is married to Mom is much less likely to live in poverty, get arrested as a juvenile, be suspended or expelled from school, be treated for emotional or behavioral problems, or drop out before completing high school. Taxpayers foot the bill for more than $300 billion a year in means-tested government spending on low-income single moms – and, in relatively rare cases, single dads.

One budding national leader, himself a young husband and father, nailed the poverty portion of the tragedy of absent fathers when he cited similar statistics five years ago and wrote:

In light of these facts, policies that strengthen marriage for those who choose it and that discourage unintended births outside of marriage are sensible goals to pursue.

Those words come from husband, father and then-Senator Barack Obama’s 2006 best-seller “The Audacity of Hope.” He was correct then, and he should implement marriage-strengthening policies today.

To reinvigorate marriage in lower-income neighborhoods, Rector suggests, government could start by providing facts on the role of healthy marriages in reducing poverty and improving the well-being of children. Why not teach skills for selecting a wife or husband? Why not explain the importance of developing a stable marital relationship before bringing children into the world?

Nothing could be further from government practice. In social service agencies, welfare offices, schools and popular culture across America, what Rector calls “a deafening silence” reigns on the topic of marriage. The welfare system actively penalizes low-income couples who do get married. He adds:

For most on the Left, marriage is, at best, an antiquated institution, a red-state superstition. From this viewpoint, the real task is to expand government subsidies as a post-marriage society is built.

Rather than adopt policies to reverse the 50-year spike in births outside marriage, though, President Obama in his 2011 budget “would eliminate the one program dedicated to encouraging healthy marriage,” notes Jennifer A. Marshall, Heritage’s director of domestic policy studies.

Marshall writes:

In its place would be a program promoting a notion of ‘fatherhood’ that doesn’t involve the father being married or in the home. The facts speak for themselves. It’s time more policymakers noticed what the facts are saying.

Something to think about, Mr. President. Happy Father’s Day.

Love Shouldn't Hurt

Dating violence is a serious issue which isn't ignored at the Women's Care Center. From our staff who counsels couples towards healthy relationships to our educators in the classroom teaching on the "con games" in relationships, we are developing hope in and for our community.

That is why this recent blog by I Am That Girl was so sad to me. Sad because it involved dating violence in my hometown of Charlottesville, VA. Violence which ended in a murder. Sad because no one said anything. Sad because it could have been prevented.

Love Shouldn't Hurt

by Ashley Thill

Could she have been saved? That is the question on the minds of many after the death of Yeardley Love. Love was a lacrosse player for the women’s team at the University of Virginia. She was a beautiful and sweet 22-year-old, set to graduate. She was found dead in her apartment nearly a month ago. Her ex-boyfriend, George Huguely, a fellow lacrosse player on the men’s team, stands accused in the case of her murder. After the story broke, more news came forward about Huguely’s violent and obsessive ways. Those near Love and Huguely seemed to recognize his temper and his fixation on Love. Yet no one came forward or said anything. This is why the University of Virginia and the nation is reeling about whether Yeardley Love’s murder could have been prevented.

Huguely’s lawyers are calling his actions “an accident with a tragic aftermath.” However, dating violence is no accident and should not be treated as such. The National Violence Against Women Survey, co-sponsored by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and the National Institute of Justice, reported that nearly 25% of women report being physically assaulted or raped in their lifetime. That adds up to nearly 4.8 million female victims of intimate partner violence each year.

Many young people who are victims of dating violence often don’t realize that there is something wrong. They have little experience and may think that it is “normal” relationship behavior or it will stop. Obviously, none of the people around Love thought to go to someone about Huguely’s behavior toward her nor does it appear that Love did so herself.

Dating violence isn’t just physical either. The CDC classifies different forms of dating violence as verbal, emotional, physical and sexual. The last two are often the most focused on but verbal and emotional abuse can take a toll; they also may be the least recognizable. These types can be confused as teasing (such as when dating partners call each other names) or as a sign of love, like when someone threatens to hurt him or herself if a partner expresses desire to end the relationship.

The most important thing is to educate adolescents so they learn from a young age to recognize dating violence. Incorporating curriculum about dating violence into health classes is one way to ensure young people are exposed to signs of violence and abuse early.

The saddest part of this whole story is that Love’s death probably could have been prevented, if someone had intervened. Now not only is this young woman dead, but Huguely faces life in prison. If something had been done, both Love and Huguely could have gone on to lead fulfilling lives. It’s our turn as a society to learn something from this tragedy and prevent cases like it form happening in the future.

Ideas from the Dating Divas

I stumbled upon a blog by the Dating Divas who describe the blog as such:

Once upon a time, there were a group of FABULOUS divas...twelve to be exact...who realized that they all had the same problem! Each of them was married to a super-duper hottie, of course, but they were discovering that they were letting LIFE take over...and weren't focusing on their husbands as much as they would like! Since these divas were so fabulous and all...they quickly came up with a plan. They would take turns posting a super fun, creative, AND inexpensive date each week on their "Dating Divas" blog! And, of course, being the fabulous divas...and all..they decided to share those dates with the rest of you!

Sounds like fun, huh? Wait until you see their awesome posts.

This one has got to be one of my favorite: Couples Minute to Win It, taylored after the TV game show. Included on their blog is a ready made invitation that you can use to host your own Minute to Win It party.

If your dating life has gotten too routine (whether your single or married) try out some of their and let us know how it goes!

Or, if you're creative come up with your own and contact the Divas!